I spent my entire career in a profession where I was confident in what I was doing, achieving… I felt I was contributing to a critical need, so nothing stopped me. I rarely had that feeling of giving up… rather when something wasn’t going right, I made changes. But after retiring, things did change. But was it me, or my situation?
After retiring I no longer had that burning drive; everything I did now became a hobby, after all, I didn’t need the money… well I thought. I did enough to get by, helping people as a consultant I could work my own hours. I did spend much of my time helping others… and as I became more and more aware, helping them with their dreams. I had up to that point figured I no longer had any interests or dreams of my own. Again, I was retired.
So what does this have to do with anything? Because I retired, everything changed for me. My perspective of how I work with people remained the same, but I needed to change that perspective. The dynamics were different; my expectations needed to be adjusted, but again, given I was retired I just never gave it much thought. Goals? If I had one it certainly wasn’t the same as everyone else’s… hey I was retired. I was always there for others... and their team, but it wasn’t my team.
At one time in my career I had the responsibility for putting together a production team while in the pre-cast concrete business; it became a great team. Never had so few, did so much, for so little under the worst conditions. But we were a family although we were not related... that was the way I worked... it is the way I like to treat my "team". During my career in the Navy, we built strong teams… leadership training and application is one of the most important proficiencies one can achieve in life and the Navy did an excellent job in that area. The common thread among all the various jobs I had was we “all” had a job to do… we were all professionals. Didn’t matter if we were slinging mud, or working in the world of electronics and high technology, we worked together as a team. So building a team has never been something new. Then I retired… and it all changed for me… my way of thinking and the way I used to do things just didn't seem to be clicking, and it started weighing heavy on my mind. Before retiring, we all did our jobs without being concerned about where the money was coming from; we got paid every week, or whatever the schedule was.
When I retired I just couldn’t simply lay around doing nothing. Before retiring I dabbled in the web business as a result of affiliating with a product brokerage company. I had some health issues and found their nutritional line of Isotonix supplements turned my life around so I decided to affiliate with them. One of the most important aspects of my life has been to only associate with people, organizations, companies I can trust and rely on. It just so happened that this one company had a rock solid history and a great track record; and to be honest there was one very important aspect about this company that made a significant impression on me; they had a strong family culture built in – one where even if there were no financial connections, everyone was there helping everyone else in a “team” environment. I felt at home. Given I had been with them for so long during my years as an analyst and consultant, I never had the real desire to build a business until a few years after retiring. Things have a way of changing one's mind when there are changes in one's financial stability... or lack there of.
After a few years after retiring I began to make changes in my focus but things just didn’t seem to click as well as I had hoped. Ever have that happen to you? What do you do about it? Blame others? Get mad? Worry about the problems? What good does that do? But hey, we all know it’s easy to quit… it’s so easy to talk bad about someone, something, or how miserable life treats you - or how “unfair” everything is. Ever hear that one? (Don’t get me started) It takes courage to say it is my fault… I am the one who is the problem. It is so easy to give up on yourself… but I submit to you this nugget of insight… if you give up, NOT everything and everyone “else” is wrong. Who was it that made the brilliant observation that you are always right?
If you say you can’t, you’re right / if you say you can, you’re right.
Some people can play baseball, some people can’t; some people can play football, some can’t. Pick any sport… some people have a gift, some don’t. It may be a physical impossibility that is the cause. But then, what about those who can… are they all equal? No… those who practice and work the hardest will be better than those who don’t. Look at golfers… now you know you have to have some coordination correct? But the one who practices the most will be the ones who win more championships. The musician who practices the most gets to be part of the orchestra. Same with anything in life. It all boils down to this... we all are given choices... the choice to complain, the choice to give up, the choice to be lazy, the choice to work hard, the choice to work smart, etc. What choice will you make?
But here is what caused me to think about my own challenges which recently had been causing me stress and frustration, and was the impetus to writing this blog at 3:00 am in the morning. (When you have something in your head, get it down in writing otherwise you lose it.) Her name is Jordan Bone… several years ago she was injured in a severe car accident sustaining a C6 injury. As any of us could testify, when we’re young we believe we’re invincible, nothing can stop us. But when thrown a life changing blow, becoming a paraplegic totally devastated Jordan. Jordan was depressed, unsure of what the future could be like for someone who could not walk and no longer able to use her hands. Feel free to read her blog but it was her video that really got to me… and got me to thinking straight again. When you watch the video, her story will hit home to many. The point she brought home to me was profound - she made a choice... she never gave up!
We all have challenges… we just have to be honest with ourselves when dealing with them. So, do you really want to give up? You think you have it bad? You think you’re the only one in the world who has been dealt a bad hand, or is unlucky? Think about people who I consider heroes like Jordan Bone… this video is quite inspiring; and reminded me of the type of person I want to be around… the type of person I want on my team. Now I understand even more why people I work and associate with over the past several years look for those who have “The Right Stuff”. They may not start out with it… but I know, if I ask the right questions, if I find that person who has the desire… together we can make things happen.
We all have challenges… we just have to be honest with ourselves when dealing with them. So, do you really want to give up? You think you have it bad? You think you’re the only one in the world who has been dealt a bad hand, or is unlucky? Think about people who I consider heroes like Jordan Bone… this video is quite inspiring; and reminded me of the type of person I want to be around… the type of person I want on my team. Now I understand even more why people I work and associate with over the past several years look for those who have “The Right Stuff”. They may not start out with it… but I know, if I ask the right questions, if I find that person who has the desire… together we can make things happen.
Don’t give up on yourself, don’t give up on others. But caution: know this… do not under any circumstances work with the wrong people! The ones that always complain, the ones who always tell you how bad they have it - run fast and hard away from them.
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